So I Just Smile
by Chada
Summary: He looked at Naruto and saw the blonde-haired boy stand up as he wiped away any evidence of tears and tried to toughen himself up to block out the ridicule that he seemed to expect Iruka to lob his way. So Iruka decided to prove him wrong. One-shot.


Just a brief Author's note and Disclaimer: A Naruto one-shot I decided to write in which there was a slightly different aspect of how Iruka opened up to Naruto and vice versa. I think that would make it a little AU, I guess? Anyway, I wrote this for pure enjoyment, but reviews are greatly welcomed. Thanks ~ Chada

I do not own Naruto nor it's characters. Just this little plot.

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So I Just Smile

Umino Iruka sighed in exasperation as he thought of his class of young shinobi hopefuls that he just released from the room 30 minutes before leaving the academy himself. He ended up with the children from all the major clans in the village, as well as clan-less ones, and it seemed, to the academy teacher, that none of them were right in the head. The one who troubled (and mainly angered) him the most was Uzumaki Naruto.

The boy had no focus! He would try the patience of Buddha himself! He had heard things from the other academy instructors about his behavior and horrible lack of skill, but he thought they had been exaggerating! Though there was no love lost for the boy on Iruka's (or much of the village's) part because of what he contained within his belly, he believed that Naruto should still be given the benefit of the doubt to prove himself capable of being a ninja.

By the time Naruto arrived to his classroom, the chuunin discovered that what was said about the kid's reputation was true! He was hyperactive, loud, doesn't pay attention, skips class, falls asleep in class, his taijutsu is a mess, his ninjutsu is lacking, his genjutsu is non-existent, and don't even _start_ on his chakra control; not to mention his chronic addiction to pranking! The kid was a walking ADD menace! Iruka was at his wits end.

He sighed again, this time a little more glumly.

He noticed the rest of the village's behavior towards Naruto: the glares and the utter lack of attempt to be discrete as they muttered hateful and disparaging remarks when the boy passed. He knew about how the shops around the village would refuse him service, or sell him poor quality items at outrageous prices, or just out and out chased him down the street for even glancing in the general _vicinity_ of their store. At first, Iruka didn't care. After all, the little cretin deserved it. Right? _Someone_ had to pay for what happened back then…Right?

The young academy teacher decided, no. The one who needed to pay was getting its just desserts with the ultimate insult to a creature of its power. Locked inside the body of a human; a human _child_ to add the icing on the proverbial cake. And when Iruka took a closer look at Naruto…

He heard raised voices coming from an alleyway close by, and he just noticed that he had wandered into Naruto's neighborhood in the rundown part of Konoha.

"Haven't you learned yet? How d'ya like this, ya little bastard!" A male voice shouted from the alley.

There was a sound of a solid smack of someone being struck, and boy's voice cried out in pain. It sounded familiar. That prompted Iruka to action.

He ran over to the alley and what he saw made the command to desist die in his throat. Two men were in the alley; one was holding the arms of a young blonde-haired boy clad in a horribly orange jumpsuit. Iruka stared in disbelief. The second man reared back and punched Naruto across the face, _hard_, and the chuunin could see the boy's lip was split and the inside of his mouth was bleeding. Iruka blinked and his brain jumpstarted up again.

"HEY! What the hell do you think you're doing?!" He shouted.

The two men turned to him; the one holding Naruto's arms released him unceremoniously to drop heavily to ground, like a marionette with the strings cut. With a quickly whispered "Let's go," they left the alley, skirting around Iruka and watching him with wide eyes. After they rounded the building and took off at a dead run, Iruka loosened up the straining grip on the kunai he didn't remember drawing.

He decided to ignore the two, for now, and moved toward Naruto who was dusting himself off after having got off of the ground. He would report those two to the Hokage later.

As he got closer, Naruto suddenly looked up and their eyes locked, and Iruka got a better look at the damage done. The orange clad boy was also bleeding from a cut over his left eye and blood was trickling out the corner of his mouth and down his chin to drip onto his jacket. Iruka decided he wasn't too fond of the color red at that moment. A bruise was beginning to purple on his right cheek, where he had been struck, and he noticed a bit of crusted blood on the edge of the nostrils of his nose.

Iruka _really_ didn't like red at the moment.

Then Naruto looked away and resumed trying to brush away the dirt and grime from his clothing, murmuring to himself "why the hell are alleys always wet?"

Iruka stepped closer once more and gently called out his student's name while reaching out a hand. When Naruto looked up and noticed the hand coming straight for him, he flinched hard and instinctively brought up his arms to ward off any incoming blow. Iruka froze with his hand in the air, his eyes alarmed, his mouth wide and his heart painfully lodged in his throat. He limply dropped his arm to his side and stepped back.

Naruto tentatively peeked through the small gap in his arms, realized there was no strike coming, and brought his protection down slowly while stepping back quickly. His shoulders were so tense, Iruka could see the boy shivering ever so slightly and the academy instructor couldn't help but feel ever so _helpless_.

"Naruto—" Iruka said, his voice cracking slightly on the last syllable. He cleared his throat and tried again, "Naruto, are you alright?"

The boy was shocked at the question, he stared at the man for a few seconds before he blinked rapidly and squeaked out a "Fine!" and became so focused on patting down his clothes that Iruka wanted to be sick.

This was _not_ the obnoxious preteen who would charge into class and declare at the top of his lungs that he would be Hokage some day! And Iruka decided he didn't like this Naruto imposter. He remained standing the distance that the boy set between them while said boy's almost frantic attempts at cleaning off the ground-in dirt off his bright clothing calmed down. Naruto stood stock still for a moment before he hastily wiped the blood from his brow and the corner of his lips, and spitting what had pool into his mouth on the ground. Iruka stared at the red glob in morbid fascination; he might actually_ hate_ the color red for while…

And then the boy in the terribly bright orange clothing looked up at his teacher and smiled. A large smile that made his eyes scrunch up and Iruka fear it would split his face in half. The man instantly knew it was fake.

"Naruto," Iruka tried again, "Are you alright?"

"Tch! Of course I am, Iruka-sensei!" Naruto replied brazenly, the grin still stretched painfully from ear to ear, "Those two couldn't hurt me on a bad day! You're looking at the future Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato!"

Iruka wasn't buying it, "How many times has this happened?" he asked, remembering what he heard before he entered the alleyway.

The boy winced and his smile faltered. Then it kicked up again, full force.

"It ain't nothin' to worry about, Iruka-sensei!" Naruto replied.

"Naruto—" Iruka started.

"Really!" He reiterated, oddly insistent. "It's…just that time of year again, I guess."

Right then, Iruka knew that Naruto knew something wasn't right; the boy just couldn't put his finger on it. _That time of year again_. It was getting closer to October 10th: Naruto's birthday; the festival. The chuunin felt nauseous.

"Why haven't you told anyone about this?" Iruka asked.

And Naruto frowned.

"What does it matter?" he said, voice noticeably bitter despite the grin on his face, "Who would believe the _troublemaker_? Right?"

It was Iruka's turn to flinch upon hearing the name he used for this particular student on occasion, "That gives them no right to beat up on you! Someone of authority needs to be notified that something like this is going on!"

"Iruka-sensei," Naruto whined, his tone sadly weary, "Just…just leave it alone. Please? I mean, it happens every year, yeah? It's become almost like a tradition! Like the festival!" And there was that smile again. It was almost like a mask. Iruka decided he didn't like _that_ either.

Naruto walked past the chuunin and out of the alley, the grin still across his face. Iruka stared at the red glob that Naruto had spit out on the ground moments ago before he turned and followed after him.

He caught up to and followed behind the boy as they passed Naruto's rundown apartment building and ascended the hill behind it. They didn't really pass anyone. In fact, this part of the village looked almost deserted—like this area was being avoided… Naruto sat down and drew his knees to his chest, resting his chin on top of them and staring down at the scenery below. It was a pretty high hill, high enough that some of the training grounds could be seen. Iruka sat down next to his troubled student, and neither spoke for a while.

"How can you do that, Naruto?" Iruka finally asked his tone sad.

"Huh?" Naruto grunted, confused, "I haven't done anything…that I know of."

The academy instructor frowned, "How can you smile after what just happened?"

This time Naruto frowned, "What else _can _I do?"

"I don't understand." Iruka replied.

"If I get angry, they would call me a monster and threaten to get the authorities. If I cry, they make fun of me or get mad," said Naruto.

"What?"

"_What right does the monster have to be sad?_" The boy's tone practically dripped acidic sarcasm. "HA!" He barked a mocking laugh.

Iruka didn't know what to say to the obvious anger and pain in Naruto's voice, and so said nothing. The boy looked back over the scenery, rocking back and forth as he plucked at the worn knee of his pants. He looked so…_tired_. So worn-down and bone-weary—a child wasn't supposed to look like that.

"You know what I wish I could do, when I stand there and smile?" Naruto asked, his words muffled whispers into the material of his clothing.

"No." Iruka replied, his words just as soft.

"I wish I could get angry," he chuckled wetly and he sniffed, but his eyes remained dry, "I wish I could cry. I wish…" Naruto drew in a shaking breath and blew it out in a huff, "I wish I could scream so _loud_ and so long until I couldn't _breathe_," he gasped, his words picking up moment and gaining a little volume, "until my throat was sore and torn and _bleeding_ so that someone, god, _anyone_ would hear me and come and put their arms around me and tell me that 'it'll be OK' and I can stop _hugging myself_ so I don't _fall apart_." Finally, his voice cracked and a tear slipped down his flushed cheeks from reddened eyes. "But I can't," Naruto whispered once more, "and they won't. Everybody else has their own problems to deal with, so who would care about mine?" A shrug, "So I just smile."

Iruka remembered that he didn't like the color red again.

He also remembered being a sad and angry child like Naruto, but never of this magnitude or with this intensity. What normal child, no, what normal _person_ would put up being beaten year after year and still smile at their tormentors? And he wanted to be a _leader_ to these people? To protect the village that would sooner see him hang then spare a kind word for a boy that never knew his mother or father or had _any_ family? Withholding pity for a boy that was dealt a hand ridiculously unfortunate and the only one in your corner was an elderly man who could only do so much, and certainly not enough, to help that boy?

Iruka didn't delude himself into thinking that Naruto wanted to be Hokage for purely selfless reasons. He wanted to prove himself. He wanted to prove that he could and would be the best; to prove that they had no reason to fear or hate him; that he loved this village just as strongly, if not stronger, than they. He wanted to be Hokage in spite of what they labeled him: A troublemaker, a monster…_the demon, Kyuubi no Kitsune, incarnate_. Iruka shuddered.

He looked at Naruto, whose smiling trickster mask had cracked after his confession, and saw the blonde-haired boy stand up as he wiped away any evidence of tears and tried to toughen himself up to block out the ridicule that he seemed to expect Iruka to lob his way. That _hurt_. So Iruka decided to prove Naruto wrong.

"Naruto?" He murmured, getting to his feet as well.

Naruto turned toward him "Wha-?" The boy's question died on his lips.

Iruka had turned and hugged him. Naruto stared wide-eyed over the chuunin's shoulder, his mouth hanging open slightly in shock.

"It'll be ok, Naruto." Iruka said quietly, his chin resting on top of his blonde hair.

Naruto noticed his vision getting blurry and hot to which his eyelids fluttered in a surprised blink; and wetness rolled down his cheek to drip on the olive green vest he was being held against. Naruto tried to breathe in calmly, but all he managed was a shuddering breath; he wanted to exhale slowly, but all that came out was a sob. And what really threw him was that at some point, he had brought his arms around his academy instructor and clenched the olive green chuunin vest in his fists so tightly, his knuckles were white and his hands actually hurt.

But he didn't let go, and neither did Iruka, so he decided that just this once, he would stop hugging himself. Naruto knew Iruka wouldn't let him fall apart.


End file.
